Spirituality: Graceful Acceptance!

Spiritual Discourses: Graceful Acceptance!

By Swami Viditatmananda Saraswati*

Graceful acceptance is being in the present and enjoying things as they are!

Why do we pre-suppose that only certain things can be enjoyed? When the mind enjoys graceful acceptance, we can see that all that exists is beautiful. To the extent that the mind becomes free from projections or preconceived notions, it gains the freedom to enjoy things as they are. The Upanișads say that this creation emerged from the fullness of the Lord and, therefore, reflects beauty, harmony, order, and wholeness. This should become our experience. In fact, we need not do anything to experience it. What we are already experiencing is indeed this fullness. However, based on preconceived notions, our interpretation of reality appears different. We can be more in tune with the reality as our preconceived notions disappear.

Graceful acceptance enables us to be in the present and enjoy it for what it is. If you do not have preconceived notions of what is beautiful, successful, or enjoyable, life becomes a luxury to be enjoyed. This includes being comfortable with ourselves. The simplest things in life will then become a source of great enjoyment. For instance, the mere fact that we can walk can be a source of satisfaction; we do not need to necessarily walk a long distance to be happy. This is freedom – a freedom from the need to change things around us. The surrender of our demands, complaints, blaming, judging, and preconceived notions gives us the freedom to be what we are and to enjoy whatever is.

Vedanta teaches that all our problems are resolved when we understand the reality. We will realize that all of this is mithyã or unreal and appreciate satyam or the truth. Even questions of fairness etc. will cease to matter because we will know that the duality we perceive is deceptive. When the truth of non-duality is discovered, none of the questions will remain. Vedanta says that when we understand the nature of reality, the ‘what’ or ‘why’ will not remain. If you look closely at what you consider as the creation, duality etc., you will find that the apparent many-ness is not the ultimate reality. Oneness alone is the reality. Why should a rope appear as a snake? Only if the snake were real, should the question ‘why’ arise. Similarly, the question, “Why should īśvara create this universe?” vanishes, since this universe is mithyã. Since the world is not real, the question is not valid. This is the ultimate answer.

Graceful acceptance lies in surrendering our notions of success and failure!

Graceful acceptance lies in accepting whatever happens in a graceful manner and with the conviction that there is fairness. The attitude of graceful acceptance should be maintained even in success. Generally, we have no difficulty in accepting outcomes that are in keeping with our expectations or exceed our expectations. The difficulty arises when we have to deal with unfavourable situations. One need not take either credit for success or blame for failure. One is the author of the action alone, not of the outcome. Īśvara determines the outcome through the laws of karma. Graceful acceptance lies in attributing the authorship to īśvara in both success and failure and accepting him as the order that creates every situation. Then, even when the mind protests that a given situation should not be so, we would accept it in the knowledge that it is a product of infinite wisdom; one’s attitude would change. If we trust that īśvara is our well-wisher, we will be inclined towards graceful acceptance. However painful an outcome might be, we will try to see meaning and purpose in it. Since it comes from īśvara, it is his prasäda, grace.

Nothing in this world is capable of giving lasting happiness. One’s frame of mind alone can determine whether there is happiness. An outcome is normally judged by subjective criteria of success and failure. However, rather than being judgmental about success and failure or fair and unfair, one should take whatever comes from īśvara as being appropriate. We must be objective in judging this. In giving a certain kind of outcome, īśvara may be suggesting that we change our definition of success. Yet, in this manner of acceptance, there is no place for resignation or non-response.

Lord Krishna says in the Bhagavad Gita [3-8]:

niyatam kuru karma tvam karma jyayo hyakarmanah,
sarirayatrapi ch te na prasiddhyedakarmanah.

Do action that is to be done because action is superior to inaction. And due to inaction, even the maintenance of your body would become impossible.

An outcome is inevitable when we perform any action, only, we do not know which outcome corresponds to which action. Neither do we know which action is responsible for the situation that we are presently confronting. Nevertheless, we are sure that whatever situation we face is a result of some action that we may have performed in the past. Graceful acceptance is in having an objective frame of mind.

There is an account that is told to illustrate this ability. It is the story of a Greek philosopher who moved to another land to seek his fortune. After he had established himself there, he sent for his family to join him. His wife and children soon set sail with all their belongings. One afternoon, while he awaited their arrival, there was a knock on his door. It was a messenger with news for him. “Sir,” the messenger said, “your ship has sunk.” “What?” exclaimed the philosopher in disbelief. “Your ship has sunk.” “So what?” demanded the philosopher. “Your family and wealth have all sunk with it.” “What?” After a few moments, the philosopher is said to have declared, “So what?” When the painful news was first brought to him, he exclaimed in disbelief. He was not willing to accept it. After considering the facts, though, he realized that the ship had indeed sunk, and there was nothing he or anybody could do about it; therefore, he had uttered ‘So what?’ Freedom thus lies in becoming objective with respect to our own notions. Similarly, we need the ability to create a distance when the mind reacts. We can create a distance from that reaction by deliberately identifying with īśvara.

If we review our notions and conclusions from the standpoint of objectivity, we can see that our reactions arise from a sense of insecurity, need, or fear; we can see that there is a rejection of the realities of life or resistance to them. Graceful acceptance lies in accepting that everything has a reason to be the way it is. Even in pain, then, there would seem to be a lesson: growth.

Cont’d…

*Swami Viditatmananda Saraswati has been teaching Vedānta Prasthānatrayī and Prakaraṇagranthas for last 40 years in Ahmedabad, Gujarat. Throughout the year, he conducts daily Vedānta discourses, accompanied by retreats, and Jñāna Yajñas on Vedānta in different cities in India and in foreign countries.